Life Has To Go On

             

                It was a sunny afternoon in the hospital. After a whole day of work, Tracy sat down to enjoy her chicken salad in the cafe. She spotted how a mother in her early 30's was trying to make her son sit in place so she can feed him the rest of his meal. He was running around the table making weird sounds. His mother was trying so hard to get hold of him on her lap but in vain. How tiring it must have been for her to take care of such a strong headed child like him.

              Tracy squeezed in her seat and slouched on the table thinking how much suffer her mother must have been through in bringing her up as she was very stubborn as a kid. Time has played its role very well in her life. Tracy remembered how each and every relatives of her would greet her, They would rub her head and without a second thought would say, "she is your youngest daughter right? The one who would torture you death to finish one small bottle of milk?" My mother would always laugh the statement away. Her laughter signifies that she was not at all regretting any part of those sufferings for she was satisfied to see the outcome over the years.

                  Days went by. One day, Tracy was sitting on the floor with her back against the wall and her chin resting on the knee and her arms holding her leg tight. There was an intense smell of chrysanthemum flowers and incense sticks in her living room. Everything seemed blurred as people came in and went out of the house with flower garlands in their hands. Her maternal grandaunt was constantly asking her to eat something and she would just reject the offer away by shaking her head with no emotions.

                    She sat there for quite sometime when she saw a tall figure was walking towards her. It was her granduncle. He bent down to her and kissed her head and said " you have about an hour left with your mother, why don't you go sit close to her? you would not want to regret missing this opportunity years later.". Tracy felt as if her head was hit by two heavy buses full of sumo wrestlers. 

"How can he give a timeline for her to stay with my mother? This wasn't fair at all. Just one hour for me to spend with my mother."

She slowly moved towards her mother and looked at her. She seemed as if she was sleeping. Her simple make up and the rose petals around her body made her look very calm and divine. She placed her hand on her mother's face. Tears were streaming down her cheek and her lips were pursed trying to control her emotions. She felt a slight pain in her chest and stomach as if someone was strangling her with rope. She lowered  herself down so her face would be near to her mother's face. She took a deep breath

 "I will miss you",

You have no idea how much I will miss you my baby.

"Why are you being so selfish by leaving me here all alone?"

Trust me Tracy, it wasn't at all my choice to leave you and go. I really want to stay with you all forever.

"Promise me that you would always be there for me and never leave me".

Trust me baby, I would always watch over each and every one of your steps and be right behind you at all circumstances.

"And i promise that, I will be a good daughter and will always cherish each and every moment we have spent together. I will always adore your warm hands and chest and call it home till the end of my life".

As Tracy rose up from the floor, few men came and lifted the coffin up. People in the house started singing prayer songs in louder voices as they marched out. Tracy remained in the living room watching everyone was now moving out of the house. She stood there thinking that the house would now be  empty without the presence of her beloved mother. She was not allowed to follow them for the burial. She stayed home, took her bath and decided to sleep till next morning. 

She woke up the next morning and got dressed to go to the graveyard to fulfill the last few rituals for her mother. Tracy saw her uncles were standing near a place where there was a pile of ashes and smoke was coming out of it. She knew that was the remaining of her late mother. After they poured a a bucket of water on the ashes and waited for it to cool down a bit, her granduncle commanded them to look for the visible pieces of her bones. 

Effortlessly, Tracy dipped her fingers into the ashes and started searching. She found a few  teeth of her mother, a few pieces of broken skull bones and a bone which she couldn't recognize from which part of the body it came out from. Tracy held them all tight in her palm and finally dropped them into a pot. After all the bones were taken out, they went to a nearby beach to wash the remaining off. As she saw her ever loving father wash away his wife's remaining, Tracy stood at the shore imagining that her mother would now have rest in peace in heaven. 

After washing them away, her father turned around with tears in his eyes and walked towards Tracy forcing out a smile trying to convince his little daughter that nothing has changed and everything will be okay. He held Tracy in his arms and kissed her forehead and walked with her in silence. That moment, Tracy realized what is the meaning of living as a family and being there for each other. The few minutes of silent walk with her father has made her understand the most important lessons of life.